Saturday, March 05, 2011

When is enough, enough.  When can you say I have done all I could and I can not do anymore?  When can I say THAT was the proverbial straw that broke the camels back? 

I could chalk it up to my moodiness.  But that lets others off the hook for their behavior.  Lets them off the hook for their responsibilities.  Why is it I am held to certain standards, expected to behave and abide by these standards and others get the free pass, no matter the reason?

I am a person who likes to be in control.  I know this, I work on this all the time.  Especially since my children turned into teenagers and let me know I was never really in control of anything.  Except in my head.

But when do you say enough.  I am done with you and this ridiculous behavior.  You are responsible for yourself, your actions, and your behaviors, and ultimately your consequences.  It is not my fault if you fail, if you can't do you job, if your upset, if your having a bad day. 

Is it my turn to be selfish, to not care what anyone else thinks?  To say hey back off I am in a bad mood so don't get in my way and don't even think of asking me to do anything that is expected of me.  If I don't feel like doing something, then not do it.  With no repercussions.  If the house is a mess, someone else will clean it.  If I feel like surfing the net all day instead of working then so be it.  Tip toe around me for once, worried that if you say the wrong thing at the wrong time I will blow up in front of the entire office and then it can be your fault I did it because of how you spoke to me or asked me to do my job.  Come home when I want and not let anyone know where I am or what I am doing.  Have someone support me and my every whim and not give anything back to the household or for that matter even say thank you.  Do poorly in school and not care.  Do poorly at work and not care.

Yea this grown up, working, family thing ............... not all it was cracked up to be sometimes.  Why anyone would be in a big rush is beyond me.  But then again like I said before I could just be extra moody today.  Not that all of the above doesn't really happen, just usually better equipped emotionally to handle it normally.

1 comment:

Felicia D said...

:(

Ruv you