Sometimes I wonder......................... If I knew what I know now when I was young and deciding to have children................ Would I still?
Raising children are not for the weak at heart. You must have nerves of steel and no feelings what so ever.
You give these amazing little darlings your heart the moment you meet them. You can't help yourself. All it takes is the second you hold them and they look up at you with those tiny little eyes and your a goner. While they are young they are the most loving little creatures you will ever encounter. You are their security, their safety blanket. They make you feel like an invincible giant, a super hero so to say.
Then they enter elementary school. My little darlings still allowed me to kiss them goodbye before going into the school, getting on the bus, or running off with their friends. But you feel it, little by little you are not their security or safety blanket. By grade 6 you are no longer the super hero. You are a source of money, food, clothing, rides.
By Middle School you shaunt dare even think of getting a hug much less a kiss as they leave you for what ever the reason. They are starting to "test" their boundaries. Not all of our little angels will push their boundaries, or at least not with venom. But here in this wonderful institute that we send out children to learn...... well they learn. Unfortunately it is not always what we wished them to learn. Their circle of friends grow and you are not always able to keep them from bad influences.
Then comes high school. And your loving little angels are hormone induces devils. They talk back and say some of the most nasty things. A goddess forbid you make them live by the rules that you have requested, enforced, and lived by all of their natural born life. All you are to them now is a bank, a chauffeur, a cook, a maid. And all hell will break out if you even get the notion to request their assistance in the upkeep of said abode. I have been told many a time that "my room is my sanctuary and I will keep it as I see fit". Clean their own bathroom, heaven forbid. And before you know it they are speaking to you as you are some piece of dirt.
That is where MD and I are. Those retched teen years. They make you feel you have lost control, or that you never had it. They force you to be a drill Sargent, a police officer, and prison warden. None of which are "good vibration" types of jobs. Everything and I am not exaggerating here when I say EVERYTHING I ask turns into an argument. Did you brush your teeth? argument. Time to get off the video game....argument. Time to go to bed, time to get up.....argument. Did you do homework, come to dinner, not make dinner, try talking to him, don't talk to him. Everything is an argument.
Even telling him I love him in the morning will put him in a grumpy mood. It takes nothing to "turn the switch" and usually takes exrtreme measures to get him in a calm mood again. But by the time I get him back he has already done to damage to the rest of the family. Putting MD over the edge and getting anyone in the house involved. Don't get me wrong the girls are/were NOT saints, but at least more manageable. That could be the wrong word, I as/was not able to manage them, but they did tend to go with the flow (so to say) a lot more than the boy. I don't understand why is he sooooo angry all the time.
So like I said................ If I knew then what I know now............would we have continued having children???
Unfortunately I am a gluten for punishment and probably still would. But may the goddess help me live through the next couple of years. I am at least a determined one, and he WILL learn how to be a functioning human being yet. Not some thug is progress.